After a bad broken heart i've been thru last time, gue jadi orang yang sangat hati hati untuk merasakan sayang lagi ke orang.
i build a big wall again in myself supaya ketika gue kecewa, gue gak akan merasakan sakit yang teramat sangat seperti terakhir kali.
along the time, gue berpacaran lagi sama beberapa orang. dan everytime i should broke up, i didn't feel hurt anymore. just 1 or 2 days galau untuk menyesuaikan lagi kebiasaan abis itu udah, no more attached feeling.
ketika sedang berpacaran pun, jadi lebih merasa i have nothing to lose karna all i do just love myself more than anyone.
But, sometimes i feel so empty. i hurt people. i pushed people away as much as i want, i didn't feel guilty when i did mistakes and so on. i'm becoming an heartless person.
I know it's not good tho'. it's not the right meaning of love yourself first.
I know, all i've been done will make a good person or the right person gone.
I know, maybe i will never got the right love again.
I know, maybe karma will hit me hard again.
But, i didn't think i can deal with another deep broken heart.
Senin, 30 Desember 2019
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